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Monday, January 25, 2010

Monday Mingle Vlog Jan 25, 2010

Time for Monday Mingle vlog.

It's been a few weeks since I've joined in, but I'm here this week.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

My Dream....

I'm beginning to wonder if I will ever "GET IT TOGETHER!!" 

What do I mean by this?  Well, that's what I'm still trying to figure out.

I was able to visit with my really good friend from college on Monday, and just loved being with her, and being in her home. 

Why did I like it so much?  Well it was everything my house isn't. 

Her home is so CLEAN!! Minimal items in every room, and the walls are tan and look sharp with contrasting white base boards and trims.  She has more then one bathroom, that's definately a plus.  She has a downstairs that has a "family/rec room" down there, and there is absolutely not one bit of clutter anywhere!!

Not to mention her house is a lot newer than mine!! So things are fairly updated and look nice, and she has room for the kids to be wild, and to send them downstairs when she wants quiet upstairs. 

Oh how I wish I had the space!!

So in my new quest to find some kind of newness for me, I'm on a mission to declutter this house.  I've started in my living room, and have half the room done. With more downsizing to take place really soon. 

Next is the kitchen, followed by the bathroom area and then the bedrooms.  I've actually been going through all the "too small, too dingy, and too torn up" clothes and have thrown lots of it away, and have yet to get all the laundry done at the same time.  It feels great to get rid of this watch out, and stay out of my way  please. 

I might not have a big house, and might not be a great decorator, but I can start with eliminating all the junk and clutter that has no use in my home.  And I'm too scared to think about the MESS that awaits me in the cellar that has become the dumping grounds and really has no order to it, until recently. 

Someday I'll have a home that is bigger in size, and newer in age and then I'll not have to worry about the electrical wiring that needs to be redone, and even add in extra outlets and have to pay for that.  And maybe one day I can live in a home where all my kids can have their own rooms, and that the lights are turned on with switches rather than a pull string.  Where my office, library, and living room will all take up roots in different and separate spaces.  Where I will have adequate cupboard space and use of my walls in the kitchen, and taht the kitchen cabinetry will all match.  My bathroom will have a fan for ventilation, and then I won't feel so bad for taking my warm showers.  I'll have a big screen TV, with a few lazy boys, and in my library a huge bean bag where I will perch myself when I read.  I'd like a bay window in my bedroom so that I could sit there and read as well. 

But let me get back to reality, and just be appreciative of my home that I do have. Because it's something we can afford with the job we are fortunate to have.  But I hear it's also great to have a dream/goal so that life always seems worth going on.  (not to say without this one dream, that my life would not be worth living, because it most certainly is, this just helps)

I'm so glad that I have a husband that is able to know and figure out how much we can really afford and that we were smart with the type of loan we got into.  I'm glad that we didn't run into trouble and not be able to afford the before mentioned dream house and now be facing foreclosure or become homeless even.  I'm grateful for my roof over my head, and the job my husband has.  I'm also grateful for my kids, even when they get crazy and ridiculous.  I wouldn't have it any other way.  Until the time and money are right.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

A letter to someone from my past....

I've decided to follow suit and join up with Mama Kat on a writing prompt. So here's a letter to my first love that broke my heart....

Hey You,

I just wanted to send a letter letting you know how much you really meant to me!! I felt a real connection to you, and you always seemed to get my heart pumping fast whenever you walked into the room.  I thought maybe we'd have been able to really have and pursue a relationship.  And if you had intentions of not doing so, you certainly didn't let it known.

I remember dropping by and visiting and talking with you for hours, and watch you clean and take care of all your guns and ammo stuff.  Then we'd go out and you'd shoot them off. 

Yeah, I remember kissing you, and thought I was in absolute heaven!!  And then every time we would see each other after that, my blood was boiling because you'd seem to heat up the room.  I really felt that I loved you, and part of me still does. 

But when I was informed right before I headed off to college that you were actually (three timing) seeing another girl in the stake, myself, plus a girl that was somewhere in Utah at the time.  As in the words of Buttercup, " I died that day!!"  but fortunately I knew that what we had wasn't true love. 

I managed to get beyond my feelings I had for you, it was tough but I managed.  I wanted someone who was good, and would treat me well, and if I had pretended everything was good with us, I'd have been really upset within a short while. 

You thought you were a jerk when I found all this out, but I'm so glad I had a dear family friend tell me of such actions.  Yes I was sad and distraught, but I've moved on. 

I've now been happily married for 11 and half years, and you know what else... you may be the only one that can stir such feeling within me, but your kiss wasn't as good as my husbands!!! 

Hope you have had a nice life, but seriously I have heard you've gone a different way in life than I wanted to go, and so I think it really was best that things ended when and how they did.  And I seriously pray and hope that you aren't hurting any other hearts out there the same way mine was hurt and broken. 

But thanks for the experience because really it's part of who I am today, and a great reminder of what someone needs to know about a signicant other.  You just didn't have it, but I hope someday you can make a lady really happy and truly love her. 

I used to care about you....
and sometimes I still think of you....

But I know I'm better off without you.  Sorry but that's just how it is.

Heart Broken but I've moved on,

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Wordless Wednesday, Mostly ....not.

A picture from my recent trip to California.
 We visited my Great Grandfather, and here the two of us are!! 
He's turning 90 this next August (2010) and I'm turning 32 in April.


My Mom and Grandma just had their birthdays while we were there too.
They turned 51 and 70.

And my oldest daughter is turning 11 this year come April.  And except for Papa Jones,
all the females are the first borns.