What I meant to say .... (while randomly living my life )

It's time to get a few things off my chest. 

This last week while driving in the van, I was leaving Costco and heading down the hill towards Walmart, yes, I do shop there.  But on the way, I was calmly and politely driving inside my lane, when all of the sudden this huge vehicle like a BIG van or suburban type was drifting FAR into my lane. Luckily I had the "suicide" lane beside me that was vacated and I had to swerve over and then I HONKED my horn. She looked at me like "what, what I do?"

What I meant to say... OH MY GOSH!! Get off of your cell phone and pay attention already! You nearly side swiped me, and then I'd have been down a vehicle while yours may have went untouched!!  I can't afford something like that right now.  Please PAY ATTENTION.

Last week I held volleyball tryouts for the 7th and 8th grades at the school my kids go to.  Now never having to try out while I was in school, I wasn't exactly sure what I was getting myself into.  I had 39 students show up the first day of practice.  Boys and girls in both grades.   Some taller players, some that probably could walk under the net practically.  It was crazy!!  

What I meant to say .... What the heck did I get myself into!??  Oh my, there are a billion kids out here and it's so NOISY!!    So listen up, if you don't think you can practice every day just leave now, and don't come back, and if you currently have grade issues, leave and don't come back. Because I don't want to get excited over your skills just to find out I can't let you be on the team.  That sucks.   And when your name was called out on the last day as someone that made the team if you weren't serious about being a part of it... you should have SPOKEN UP!!   


I was out on a photo shoot last week.  This cute little boy had just turned 3 and was so handsome.  We had some awesome locations that we used.

What I meant to say.... DANG GIRL YOU'RE GOOD!!   Okay, so you never have taken a class, but I think you are a quick learner and you have some natural ability.  Keep it up.   Who cares if every shot isn't completely perfect.  But I do have to say that photo shoot turned out GREAT.    (by the way I was the photographer)  

See if you don't believe me check this out... I created this collage using the photos taken during the above mentioned photo shoot.  What da ya think?? 

I got an email from the director of the school that said the following, "  Just today I heard one of the kids say, "Coach Randolph Rocks".   So I went to practice the next day and said, that I heard I wasn't doing a good enough job and wasn't working the team hard enough. So that things were going to change and that I would be working them harder.   I started hearing some groaning, and then a student asked, "Why do you think you aren't doing a good enough job?"   And then I said, that I got this email, and told them what it said.  Of course, the kid who said it was totally smiling about it.  They all laughed. 

What I  meant to say.... Are you kidding me they like ME?? I never thought they would.  I am really enjoying myself, and I try to switch up the drills so that they aren't doing the same ones every practice.  I was all excited when I first read this that I think I'll never forget it.  Thanks Team!!  I really enjoy working with you guys.

Back to blogging .... this week.

I decided that I'd join in with the SITS ladies and get back to blogging.

Today's theme Monday, September 13: Re-upload the first post you ever wrote on your blog. If interested, re-write that post, showing us a before and after look at the piece.

So I realized that I posted this one back in April of 2009 and have had sporadically posted things on here since then, but I want to get back into utilizing this blog.  I really like this first post. 

Okay so this is a blog I wanted to start all about me, for me, and what makes my day, what drives me crazy, and the things that others do for me that make me feel glad to be ALIVE!!!

Thus the name " My Cliffs of Insanity" was chosen. Because it doesn't take much before I need a break, and if I don't get it...... I'm one step closer to jumping of that cliff. So in a way this is a place for me to "vent" and "rant" and "praise" and "Thank" when it's called for, so that I can keep my feet planted solidly where I'm at.

I'm not perfect by any means, I have a hard time doing all the things I'm supposed to. I'm nearing the ripe old age of (shhhhh 31) in just a few weeks and I'm thinking, what am I doing?? My house is constantly in shambles, I feel used and abused most days. I'm like a maid working for a not for profit organization experiencing the effects of a rough economy.

I'm not a fashion guru. I know, but it's sad too, when my favorite pair of jeans have a hole in the knee and just look completely stained ( with oil stains etc....) And the rest of my jeans ALL have holes in the knees as well. I don't spend a whole lot of time on my knees but apparently enough to wear them out.

I'm not a beauty queen. I wasn't one that you would have thought a HOT BABE in high school. ( At least I don't think I was) I do attempt to wear make up more frequently now, because I'm showing signs of wear and tear. And I feel "prettier" if I have the make up on, but all the time and effort to just forget to wash my face before I go to bed.... blah ---- most of the time I go without the make up though. That' s how I am most of the time and when my husband fell in love with me, I was a plain JANE!! So at least I don't have to try and impress anyone right now. Right??? He loves me and that's all that matters.

I was athletic at one point. Not so much anymore... . something I want to remedy in the near future. Good thing Spring is upon us, and the warmer weather is here. I'm so out of shape now, especially having five kids and not taking anytime for myself to stay physically active. Shame on me.

I try to be a good friend. Heck that's one thing I try to EXCEL at . I think having friends are important. And I don't mean " My husband is my best friend and that 's all I need..." Because he's a man, he doesn't understand the same things that I feel. But you know who does??? Or who might??? My friends of the female kind. They don't judge you, (at least not in your face) they seem to be understanding, loving, and offer advice or suggestions of things to help correct a situation. Not everyone I meet comes across as a genuine person but once in a while I'll find someone like that. Those are the ones I stay connected with. So count yourself lucky if I still have found ways to connect with you. So that's just one thing I can't stand and that's fake people. Saying one thing in front of you.... but doing something completely different out of your sight. I get the vibes, then I wait, I watch, I listen, and then I make the final conclusion.... if all the above add up ... then chances are I don't want to really continue a friendship with you... it's more like an "acquaintanceship". I'll still say Hi, and have casual chit chat, but forget about the deep and satisfying kind of conversation.

I don't like to be mistreated, so I try not to mistreat others. If I do..... usually it's a lack of communication or understanding.

I know that I'm a daughter of God, and that all things I try to do, I hope allow me closer to reaching my end result. To return to live with him again. I know that things are hard, I know that trials are a part of life. But with Him all things are possible.

As time has passed, I realize that this is still what this blog is about.  

What I meant to say ....

Okay so it could be called What I meant to say Thursday because I am getting to this so late!!!  I have good excuses and good reasons. But we won't get into those.... but I want to get it off my chest...so here I go.

• After coming home from a baby shower open house I threw for my awesome sister Amy,  My husband gave me my "mail".  What it contained was a notice to qualify for jury duty.  I know it wasn't a call to do it right away, but just a preliminary questionnaire.  Great, just what I need.  

• What I meant to say.... ARE YOU FLIPPING KIDDING ME???   I don't have time for this in my life. I'm perfectly content just being myself in my little world.  My husband works fulltime, and I have two little boys home during the day. I have to take kids to school.  What the heck, am I going to do with my house cleaning??  Go figure, just as I'm working my BUTT off to get my house decluttered and organized and CLEAN, something has to come along and upset the fruit basket and then I'll be back to square freaking one again!!  NOT FAIR.  

(Seriously, I know some people have always wanted to be on a jury. But me personally, I've never wanted to.  I thought about moving temporarily so I won't have to ever do a jury session ever, but Chris said I couldn't do that. So I've complied and filled out the form, and I'm praying like crazy that I don't have to do that.)

• Telemarketers call ALL the time.  They bombard my phone line for what seems like every day of the week and really heavy between 8-10pm.   I ignore the calls, Thank goodness for caller ID!!  

But if I were to answer the phone... 

• What I meant to say was ....   I'm sorry she's unavailable but if you give me your home phone number I'll have her call you at your least favorite time of day to recieve phone calls.  And for future reference, if you want to get through and talk to a human try calling in between the hours of 4:00-4:05pm and no other time.  She has a life of her own, and can not keep being bothered by the numbers of people trying to call and bug her, and distract her from her daily responsibilities as a wife and mother of 5.  And oh yeah, she's busy chasing her 3 year old so she can finally get him dressed but he's a bit of a booger sometimes, and it's really tiring on her.  So if she has any questions for you guys, or wants you to go over her account to make sure she has the best deal, or wants your supplemental insurance.... she'll give you a call.  Thanks for your time, but please make your calls pretty sparse in the future.    Have a ROTTEN night, since you made ours rotten.  

(Now let me clarify, I know that people make these calls for a living, heck I worked at a market research place and called all the time, I know what it's like.  But not having control over who to call and the time zone really sucked for me.  I'm just saying that I don't want the phone calls, and especially not during dinner time, and not on the Sundays)         

•  My sister in law had her baby the other day. I was happy for her.  Other friends are having their babies.    

• What I meant to say.... So when can I take their newborn pictures?  Cause you know that's what I like to do!!  I'm itching for the photo shoots...so please lets get on with it.  

• I've been busy CLEANING my house this week. Seriously ALL Day long and into the nights, followed by going to bed waking up and repeating only different tasks the next day.  I'm making lots of progress.  

• What I meant to do....  Wake up and lay on the couch either reading a great book, while nodding back off to sleep or watching a movie or to on the boob tube.  Or just running over to a friends house and hanging out.  And sometimes I wonder if I could just throw everything into a can and just BURN it all.  I won't because I know it's wrong, but what if...... ???   I'd rather have made fresh home made rolls to eat on, or good dinners instead of being so tired to do anything about it.  Yeah I know, I need a MOMMY vacation and I need it soon.