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Friday, June 19, 2009

Remodeling Projects....

So I've decided to get off of my not very active rear end, that seems to have gotten flabbier and flabbier with the growing and carrying and the the births of my five children, and try to do some "remodeling". The remodeling project mainly consists of daily walking. And I'm not talking your slow paced-casual-I'm not in a hurry-and I'm not going anywhere kind of walk. I'm talking about the get your run/walk shoes on, and your getting your arms into the swinging motion, lifting your legs one after the other, focused on one direction and that is what is right in front of you, who cares who sees you on the sidewalk, who cares if it starts to sprinkle (or worse case scenarios, it DUMPS), but your butt muscles are tightening and releasing, you breathe in and out and you get the heart rate up and going, and burn, burn, burn those calories off as you get your metabolism (what is responsible for you burning calories) going. Well it really is good for the heart too. Keeps your heart in good shape -- so I hear, now it's time to "experiment upon the word".

This remodel will cover probably hundreds of miles, and in the meantime, strength training to tone and tighten the other areas of my body, like the droopy, saggy, jiggly arms (COME ON YOU KNOW YOU HAVE THEM TOO, or at one point you did) called the triceps. The group of muscles on the back side of your upper arm, for those that don't know their anatomy or anyone elses for that matter. Especially if all you call it is "the back of my arm". Those seem to be the muscles that are the hardest for me to keep in tact. Well, actually they are in tact, thanks to my epidermis (aka SKIN) layer holding them in place. But despite having five vibrant, healthy trials children, they seem to be the set that gets lost and takes awhile to send the search party out to find out what happened to them. And seem to be the most stubborn in returning back to home base. Darn Triceps - not to be confused with TRYceratops.

Other trouble areas include, my abs (major MOMMY gut going on you know the one that looks like your ETERNALLY EXPECTING A KID, but you aren't. And your kids like to tease you relentlessly that you look like your having a baby, and come up and kiss your belly and say I can't wait to meet you baby. Oh, am I the only one with kids that weird? ) My Glutes (My BUTT, that's what your rear is called as well. At least the muscles hiding under that epidermis layer) And I tend to think of my rear as having "layers" as Shrek says in the movie, that "Ogres are like onions, we all have layers" --- okay so I probably messed that up, because I somehow lost the "script" to the movie in the mess that has been created by last years hurricanes that ran through my house, and seems to hit my piles of papers, and clothes and throws them EVERYWHERE. Sorry I'll really try and find the script so that I can correctly quote that next time. What? I don't have a script you say? Hmmm... You know what I think you might be onto something with that. Matter of fact, You are. I don't have the script. But I am too lazy to go and GOOGLE, (since that's what everyone is now doing with the internet) movie lines from movies. There might be a site, but really I don't care at the moment. You get my point though about the layers, right? My rear is like a layer an onion. But not in the way that you might be thinking. If you've ever had the opportunity of working with onions, you'll notice that most are pretty PLUMP, ROUND, and CHUNKY. But as you peel away the layers, and sometimes it's a lot of "work" because you have to keep dabbing your eyes because of the tears which are caused by PAIN from the onion. Well, so is the rear end. How? Simple.

The rear end can be one or all of the following (and in rare "rear" occasions you might just have the perfect one so this doesn't apply to you) PLUMP, ROUND, and CHUNKY. Well, you have to W.O.R.K those glutes in order to shape up the rear. You call an early end to it's vacation and tell it to get back to work right away. Well, as you work the muscles using weights you tighten and firm, which in essence is peeling away the layers of your butt, from the plumpy, round and chunky version to the now lean, slim and sexy (ier) rear end. It really is quite satisfying to see the hard work pay off.

But I also have a few other "trouble" spots. I mentioned, my Mommy gut, my butt, and just plain kickstarting my metabolism. But I also have a trouble area with my "free throw". So my goal there is to spend hours upon hours practicing the techniques and finally making all the "free throws" I want. Now, I didn't say that I was talking about basketball, did I? Because this could actually mean anything from throwing a baseball, to a football, a frisbe, and maybe a kid or two into a body of water, or a newspaper, or a wad of clothes, because let's face it, I don't get paid to do those things so they are all technically called "free throws" right?

Well, that's about it.... these few areas take a lot of time and effort, and really I can't be distracted while I'm doing this. So I'm putting ont the "I'm going to be Selfish for just an hour or two, so leave me alone" role and hopefully not make my kids or husband too angry and upset in the process. I think it's really important for me to have this time. And I'll talk more about that in the next post.