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Thursday, February 4, 2010

Emotional Connectedness, we all need it.

Okay so I'm posting a few times today, and I realize now that I should have changed the title of the last post....but alas, it is not to be.  I want that to be found pretty easily, and so I'm sticking to it. 

But on to the real business of the day. 

I've been feeling a little weirded out lately.  Not sure exactly what I mean.  But whatever it is, I'm starting to like the changes going on within.  Call me lame, but I'm really someone who needs some emotional connections either with people (and who cares if they are in movies or real life, because I don't always get time with real life women) or with a book (You know I really like a good book, but lets face it your def. and mine are probably different. I haven't read a lot of the "classics" and sometimes when I go to the book group I'm a part of, I feel kind of "dumb" for not having read them way back when, but to tell you the truth one look at the first few pages ...well I don't want to spend my time reading somthing that will "BORE" me.  If it isn't required, I'm not doing. Ha!! ) 

So just recently we switched to Direct TV and now we're getting "A LOT" more tv channels than we used to.  But at the same time, I find myself more motivated to "CLEAN UP" around the house during the day.  I find it kind of like a game.  Yeah, I'm not perfect but I do what works for me.  (Since I'm not rich enough to have a maid, or live close enough to have my mom or grandma have at my house, I have to settle for what I can barely manage to get out)

So with these new channels that I didn't get before, I'm finding movies on galore.  (I'm a real nut for LMN unless the movie is just too whacked out weird)  But I like watching the based on a true story movies, and I'll find the perfect time to fold all the laundry while watching the segment until commercials, and then I run and switch loads if needed, or I wash another rack full of dishes or whatever, until it comes on again. 

It's weird, and almost like I feel as if there is something more to my "stay at home" mom life than there used to be.  I think I'm watching way more than I used to, but I also feel like more is getting done. And then the messes are remade just as fast.  But who cares, when I have commercials to work with.  It's a game, a sort of competition for me, and gives me an adrenaline rush almost.  (That would be a HUGE ALMOST!!! )

Of course, not much can be said for the days when I have grocery shopping and bills to pay.  I'm busy all morning taking care of those tasks, and like clockwork the MESS and JUNK have found thier homes again in all the corners of the room, under the edges of the cabinets in the kitchen under the piano bench, the desk, under the kitchen table....ugh... I swear the mess is like multiplying like rabbits.   I'm not quite sure how to slow it down. 

But no worries here, I'm learning new things, and am trying new ideas to help me conquer the "clutter" in my life, and to get my kids involved in the process without going completely insane. 

And this little place I call mine, helps me vent out the frustration.  My husband gets a little perturbed that the place ALWAYS looks bad, but at the same time, I know my kids aren't going to be little forever, so I want to enjoy my time with them, and teach them when the moments come. 

So I know I'm like the only one in the "world" who can't keep her home spotless,  and all of you out there are such SUPER MOM's that you have your acts together all the time,  and kudos to you, but please don't judge this mama because I'm still a work in progress.  :)